It was only when I finally came face to face with the breakdown of my wife and the near collapse of my marriage, was I able to finally admit to my inner rage and unlock a journey towards peace.
We hope you never have to get to this point. We really do.
We could have just written generally about mental health. We could have also attempted to write about marriage or mission. But there are plenty of books and materials out there on all of those and in reality we have very few years experience to have any discerning voice in either.
What there does seem to be a lack of is honest interaction, and openness that is not concerned with keeping up appearances or offering you a guide, but enables you to engage with a truthful example of learning to be married whilst working through anxiety and mental health issues.
To be fair we did also throw into the mix moving abroad into a very intense mission work after only being married 9 months, which in itself brought up its own unique challenges. But again, we wanted to be honest about how mental health impacted this too (albeit very unknown during a majority of our time in Ibiza), and hopefully allow others involved in mission/ministry work, or simply Christian living, not to feel the need to pretend that they are superheros saving the world!
We also felt that although there is an increasing amount of exposure and attempted understanding of those suffering with mental health issues in recent years, there is a lack of material on those that are directly impacted by living with some with mental health issues. Often, the loved ones around deny their 'selfish' feelings in order to help and support their loved one in crisis and we hope its helpful to hear and acknowledge the impact that my anxiety and depression had on Abby.
As Abby and I blog, giving our experiences and views of mental health and anger issues in a relationship, we hope that whatever your experience or circumstance, you can find some company in our story and take courage that a marriage that was on its knees is beginning to stand again, and that when mental and emotional health issues lead you to despair, there is hope for things to change for the better.